Joke #9868

Q: What does a cow make when the sun comes out? A: A shadow.
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has 41.84 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal

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How do you make a small fortune out of horses? Start off with a large fortune!
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Chuck Norris looked Medusa straight in the eyes, and laughed.
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A woman gets onto a bus with her baby. The bus driver says, "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "The driver just insulted me!" The man says, "There's no call for that. You go right up there and tell him off. Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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Why wouldn't anyone play with the little longhorn? He was too much of a bully!
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Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God.
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has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, god
What’s the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead black person in the road? There’s skid marks in front of the skunk.
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has 52.96 % from 253 votes. More jokes about: animal, black people, death
A Guy goes into a bar with his pet octopus and says, "I bet $50 that no one here has a musical instrument that this octopus can't play." The people in the bar look around and someone fetches out an old guitar. The octopus has a look, picks it up, tunes up the strings and starts playing the guitar. The octopus' owner pockets the fifty bucks. The next guy comes up with a trumpet, octopus takes the horn, loosens up the keys, licks it's lips and starts playing a jazz solo. The guy hands over another fifty bucks to the octopus' owner. The bar owner has been watching all this and disappears out back, coming back a few moments later with a set of bagpipes under his arm. He puts them on the bar and says to the guy, "Now if your octopus can play that I'll give you a hundred dollars." The octopus takes a look at the bagpipes, lifts it up, turns it over, and has another look from a different angle. Puzzled, the octopus' owner comes up and says, "What are you pissing around for? Hurry up and play the damn thing!" The octopus says, "Play it? If I can figure out how to get it's pajama's off, I'm gonna screw it!"
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has 63.65 % from 117 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, disgusting, money, music
Why are there no zebras in Czech zoos? Czechs and stripes don’t mix.
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
I once had a goldfish that could break-dance on a carpet, but only for like 20 seconds.
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has 68.55 % from 248 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish, time
A man has his car full of penguins. He drives past a policeman, but the policeman stops him. He says. "Hey, you! Yeah, you! You should take those penguins to the zoo!" The man does that. The next day in the same spot, the man still has the penguins. Once again he drives past the policeman. "Hey, I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo!" "I did," replies the man. "We had so much fun that were going to the beach today!"
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has 71.52 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal