Chuck Norris can convert kilograms into centimeters.
Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower in the morning to freshen up.
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
Chuck Norris teaches math to solve its own problems.
Physics is bound by the laws of Chuck Norris.
Transformers are just another name for Chuck Norris' grade 5 science project.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris can split the atom. With his bare hands.
Three professors (a physicist, a chemist, and a statistician) are called in to see their dean. Just as they arrive the dean is called out of his office, leaving the three professors there. The professors see with alarm that there is a fire in the wastebasket. The physicist says, "I know what to do! We must cool down the materials until their temperature is lower than the ignition temperature and then the fire will go out." The chemist says, "No! No! I know what to do! We must cut off the supply of oxygen so that the fire will go out due to lack of one of the reactants." While the physicist and chemist debate what course to take, they both are alarmed to see the statistician running around the room starting other fires. They both scream, "What are you doing?" To which the statistician replies, "Trying to get an adequate sample size."
Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.