Joke #10836

Did you hear about the race horse that was so late coming in? They had to pay the jockey overtime!
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has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Ronnie goes to the auction. He notices a parrot that was on auction. Ronnie decides to bid for it and so Ronnie starts off with 50 Dollars. Auctioneer: 50 Dollars Voice: 100 Dollars Ronnie: 200 Dollars Voice: 300 Dollars Ronnie: 400 Dollars Voice: 750 Dollars Ronnie: 800 Dollars Auctioneer 800 going once, twice and the parrot is sold. Ronnie to the Auctioneer "I hope this Parrot can speak as I have spent a lot of money on it." Auctioneer Laughing: "Who do you think was Bidding against you.
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has 78.15 % from 311 votes. More jokes about: animal, money, parrot
When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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has 74.28 % from 339 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, Chuck Norris
"Yes, ma'am," the old salt confided to the inquisitive lady, "I fell over the side of the ship, and a shark he come along and grabbed me by the leg." "Merciful providence!" his hearer gasped. "And what did you do?" "Let 'im 'ave the leg, o' course, ma'am. I never argues with sharks."
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has 14.23 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: animal
There is a Bar in Calumpang who have has a Horse and they have a contest of it. Whoever will make the horse laugh will win P5,000 and free drinks. So a man from Manila comes in and the Bartender looks at him and he ask for a beer and he ask the Bartender about the contest. The Bartender tells him that whoever makes the horse laugh will win P5,000 and free beer on the house. So this guy whisper something to the horse and the horse rolls over and laughing! EEEHHH! He takes the P5,000 from the Bartender, drinks a lot of beer. As he is about to leave the Bartender ask him, "Will you be back tomorrow when we'll have a new contest?" The guy replies" Of course this is easier money than my career." So the next night.  The guy walks into the Bar with a large smile and reads the sign next to the Horse: Whoever makes the Horse cry will win P10,000 and free beer from the house. The Bartender tells the guy," Let me see you win this one." The guy approaches the Horse and shows him something. The Horse starts rolling on the ground and crying. When the guy goes to claim his prize. The Bartender says." Before I pay you, You have to tell me what you did to the horse?" The guy lights a cigarette and says," Easy the first time, I told the Horse that my penis is larger than his, the second time I showed him."
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has 69.49 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, bartender, money
Chuck Norris doesn't get shark attacked, the shark gets Chuck Norris attacked.
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
One day a blonde, brunette, and redhead were stuck on an island 100 miles away from civilization. The only way to get home was to swim. The brunette swam 50 miles before drowning. The redhead swam 64 miles before getting attacked by a shark. The blonde went 99 miles but got tried a swam back to the island.
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has 25.91 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, ginger
Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine. He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself. Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
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has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
How to you know that cows will be in heaven? It's a place of udder delight.
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, heaven
An aquarium is just interactive television for cats.
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has 71.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What is red and black? A: A sunburnt zebra.
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal