Joke #10846

How do jockeys determine which racehorses are the favourites? They take a gallop poll!
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Q: How do you know Noah was a White man? A: No nigger could stay on a boat for 40 days without eating the chickens!
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Q: What goes "oom... oom"? A: A cow walking backward!
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A man received a phone call one day, and the caller asked if he had lost a parrot. He said that he had indeed lost the bird, but wanted to know how the caller located him. The called said that the bird had landed on his balcony and kept repeating, "Hi, you have reached 555-1234. I can't come to the phone right now, please leave a message at the tone."
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When does a rabbit go exactly as fast as a train? When it's on the train.
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What did Cinderella Dolphin where to the ball? Glass flippers.
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What do you get if you cross a hippo, elephant and a rhino? A Helephino!!
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What's green with red spots? A frog with the chicken pox!
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Q: How do you know the Easter Bunny is really smart? A: Because he's an egghead.
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What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk? A milk dud.
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An elderly couple was just settled down for bed when the old man realized he left the lights on in the greenhouse in the back yard. Then they heard voices. Three men had broken into the greenhouse. Scared, they called the police. The dispatcher replied, he would send an officer as soon as one became available as they were all out on calls. The old man waited for a few minutes and called Dispatch again. He told Dispatch, "Don't worry about sending an officer, I shot the robbers and now the dogs are eating their bodies!" In no time at all, police were all over the place and captured the robbers red-handed! One of the cops asked the old man, "I thought you said you shot the robber and your dogs were eating them. " The old man replied, "I thought you said, there weren't any officers available."
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More jokes about: animal, cop, death, time