Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
Chuck Norris doesn't travel at the speed of light, light travels at the speed of Chuck Norris!
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Chuck Norris went to the virgin islands. Now they are pregnant.
While vacationing in France, Chuck Norris went out for a casual bike ride and accidentally won the Tour de France.
When Chuck Norris crosses the pacific, swimming, sharks hear the "Jaws" music.
When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt Everest by accident.
When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.