Chuck Norris sank the Titanic on a late afternoon swim.
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Charlie Sheen winning?
Chuck Norris says "I think not."
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Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed.
Some get away.
They are called astronauts.
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Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek."
He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
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When Chuck Norris throws a throwing knife, the knife doesn't kill his victim, the force of the air did.
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If Chuck Norris were a substance, he would abuse you.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.
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Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At night.
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Chuck Norris can strum your pain with his fingers, tell your whole life with his words – but mainly just kill you softly with his song.
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"With great power comes a great beard!"
- Chuck Norris.
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People created the automobile to escape from Chuck Norris...
Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris created the automobile accident.
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