Chuck Norris sank the Titanic on a late afternoon swim.
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Chuck Norris doesn't m*sturbate, he r*pes his hand.
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Chuck Norris can make same magnet polarities stick together.
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When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat.
His body cries.
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Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
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When Chuck Norris was born, he cut his own umbilical cord.
He then used it to strangle the doctor who slapped him on the but.
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After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
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UV rays are caused by Chuck Norris' smiles.
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Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
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Chuck Norris beat a black hole in a tug of war.
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Chuck Norris can kill a Great White Shark by drowning it.
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