Chuck Norris sank the Titanic on a late afternoon swim.
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Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
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Chuck Norris doesn't submit his own facts because Chuck Norris doesn't submit, period.
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Crest fights cavities, Chuck Norris kills them.
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Chuck Norris is the ghost in paranormal activity.
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In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay.
Big mistake.
You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist.
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Chuck Norris sleeps until he tells the sun to get up.
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Chuck Norris never wears steel toe boots, they make his roundhouse kicks softer.
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The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
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Chuck Norris knows how to kill you in more ways than you know how to die.
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There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.
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