Chuck Norris does, in fact, put his pants on two legs at a time.
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Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
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Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
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Chuck Norris can close Pandora's Box.
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They say, "You can't fight city hall", but Chuck Norris can.
It's not much of a fight....
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Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.
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Chuck Norris never reads the News – because Chuck Norris IS the News.
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A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
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Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off.
It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.
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Chuck Norris' first words were... "Chuck Norris".
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The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.
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