Chuck Norris never reads the News – because Chuck Norris IS the News.
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For breakfast Chuck Norris enjoys toast and jellyfish.
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Keep your friends close, and your enemies close to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
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When Death knocked on Chuck Norris’s door, Chuck Norris laughed.
Death is now Chuck Norris’s B*tch.
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Chuck Norris does not own a house.
He walks into random houses and people move.
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The only mark ever made on Chuck Norris is his birth mark.
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Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.
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Q: Do you know why infinity goes on forever?
A: Because it knows Chuck Norris is waiting for it at the end.
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Chuck Norris can stand the rain...
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Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
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