For fear of Chuck Norris, his shoes tie themselves.
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Chuck Norris has stared Fear in the face... and Fear looked away.
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Chuck Norris's black belt was made in a black hole.
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The Earth does NOT revolve around the Sun.
The Earth is stationary.
The Sun follows Chuck Norris as he makes his daily jog around the Earth.
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Shooting stars make a wish when they see Chuck Norris.
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Lawsuit commercials for personal injury are quite common with things like accidents and medication; however they never mention Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once bench pressed an 18 wheeler.
With him inside it.
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Chuck Norris does not eat.
Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
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Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burnt; that would be a foolish thing for the sun to do.
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Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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We only submit these facts so he doesn't kill us.
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