For fear of Chuck Norris, his shoes tie themselves.
Only Chuck Norris can cross the "Beyond" section of Bed, Bath and Beyond store.
Chuck Norris can make his own reflection vomit with fear.
When Chuck Norris falls over, the ground needs a band-aid
When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.
Chuck Norris can pop every kernel in the bag without burning one.
2 > 1... unless that 1 is Chuck Norris.
When you come to a road that says "ONE WAY", that mean Chuck Norris is the other way.
Once Chuck Norris attempted to punch through a brick wall, but the brick wall crumbled in fear.
Apple, Microsoft and Sony, among others, strive to invent the most cool device to please Chuck Norris, the fail all the time.
Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.