Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
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Chuck Norris doesn't m*sturbate, he r*pes his hand.
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Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris only mast*rbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
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The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
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Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator?
A: "What are you shaking about, it's me she's going to eat."
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They say, "You can't fight city hall", but Chuck Norris can.
It's not much of a fight....
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Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth.
The next day he won the lottery.
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What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef Stroke-n-off
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The creation of a perfect sphere became possible after Chuck Norris became enraged with a rubix cube and roundhouse kicked the corners off it.
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