Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
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Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
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Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
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Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
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Nice guys finish last because bad guys run faster from Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
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A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
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Chuck Norris once round house kicked a bear while on a survival trek in Siberia.
That incident was known as the Tunguska event.
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Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes.
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Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
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The Earth does NOT revolve around the Sun.
The Earth is stationary.
The Sun follows Chuck Norris as he makes his daily jog around the Earth.
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