Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
Wolverine has been called indestructible because of his adamantium skeleton... until Chuck Norris broke every bone in his body.
“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.
Once an email was sent from LA to Washington. Chuck Stopped it at St. Louis.
Willy Wonka gave an everlasting gobstopper to Chuck Norris. The flavor lasted 2.3 seconds.
Chuck Norris's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
Chuck Norris has 10 custom classes on Modern Warfare 2, and hes never prestiged.
Chuck Norris needs no further explanation.
Chuck Norris never gets dirty. The dirt is too afraid to even touch him or his clothes.
Eminem says "I'm not afraid". Chuck Norris says "I love the way you lie"
There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.