Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
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When Chuck Norris hired his bodyguards, he figured he was paying to save someone.
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Chuck Norris can pop scissors with a balloon.
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Chuck Norris's 1st Grade teacher asked him how many stars there were on the American Flag.
Chuck Norris replied "Yes." and was correct.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a will.
Invincible people don't need them.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.
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Did you know Chuck Norris's tears was the curernto Cansa, but the problem was he never ever cried.
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Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
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Chuck Norris’ PC doesn’t have a Recycle bin – because when Chuck Norris deletes something, there’s no chance of it coming back.
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Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236.
It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"
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