Chuck Norris needs no introduction, but if you need an introduction, you need Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris CAN read Lady Gaga's poker face.
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Chuck Norris can talk with his mouth closed.
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Chuck Norris stared at the sun... the sun went blind.
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The Earth does NOT revolve around the Sun.
The Earth is stationary.
The Sun follows Chuck Norris as he makes his daily jog around the Earth.
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The only reason Godzilla goes back into the ocean is because Chuck Norris is expecting him... for dinner.
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The last time Chuck Norris was hungry, all the dinosaurs suddenly got extinct...
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Every phobia known to man has a phobia of Chuck Norris.
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Extra Terrestrials often visit Earth from other galaxies - they're here to see if Chuck Norris really exists.
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Hiroshima nagasaki was nothing but the result of chuck norris skydiving in Japan.
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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack.
His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
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