15 years ago I started a burping contest with Chuck Norris... who had the longest? I don't know he is still busy.
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
Once chuck norris and time had race. Result: The time is still running.
Once Chuck Norris went back in time and kicked a ball. When it landed it wiped out the dinosaurs.
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.
A man has a racehorse, never won a race. Man in disgust says, "Horse, you win today or you pull a milk wagon tomorrow morning." The starting gate opens, the horses take-off, they move the gate away and there lays his horse asleep on the track. He kicks the horse and asks, "Why are you sleeping?" The horse, half asleep says, "I have to get up at three in the morning."
When Chuck Norris played the card game War with a friend, France surrendered.