Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?
A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
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How many blondes does it take to play tag?
One.
A blonde gets her haircut while wearing a pair of headphones.
The hairdresser asks her to take them off, but she protests that she'll die without them.
The hairdresser sighs, and starts cutting the hair around the headphones.
Soon, the blonde falls asleep, and the hairdresser removes the headphones.
A few minutes later, the blonde collapses, dead on the floor.
Alarmed, the hairdresser puts the headphones to his ear and hears, "Breathe in. Breathe out."
There's a double Decker bus driving down the street full of passengers, blonde and brunette.
On the lower level of the bus, the brunettes are having a good time, talking, laughing, and singing along to the music playing.
On the upper part of the bus, the blondes are seated... they're in a panic.
They're screaming, terrified, and holding onto each other as the bus moves along the street.
Finally, a brunette gets up and walks to the top of the bus to ask what's wrong, and one of the blonde's replies, "what's wrong?!? Well, you'd be screaming too if you didn't have a driver!!!"
Q: What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
A: Her parents named her Cindy so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
Q: Why should you keep a blonde on the job 7 days a week?
A: So you don't have to retrain them every Monday.
A blonde goes horseback riding for the first time in her life, she's never had any prior lessons or training.
As soon as her bottom hits the saddle, the horse gallops away.
Immediately the girl realizes she's not in the saddle correctly and she does everything she can to stay on the horse, she pulls on the horse's mane, she grabs the saddle ... but she realizes it's no use.
Finally she decides the best thing to do is to jump clear of the horse but as she does this, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup and she is dragged by the horse.
Her head is hitting the ground ... thump ... thump ... thump ... over and over again.
Just as she is about to lose consciousness ..... the store manager runs out and unplugs the horse!
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A blonde goes to the hospital to give blood and is asked what type she is.
She tells them she’s an outgoing cat-lover.
There was a burning building with a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde at the top.
The firemen are yelling to the redhead to jump into a blanket and she jumps off the building and right as she was about to safely hit the blanket they moved it and she dies.
They yell to the brunette to jump but she says,"No I saw what you did to the redhead"!
They shout we don't like redheads!
So the brunette jumps and sure enough they move the blanket and she dies.
Then they shout to the blonde to jump off into the blanket.
But the blonde says,"no I saw what you did to them"!
They shout we don't like them! The blonde then says, "I don't trust you guys, put the blanket on the ground and step back!"
Q: Why did the blonde have trouble in the ladies' room?
A: She is not used to pulling her own pants down.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were atop a 5 story building when a genie appeared and told them to run to the edge, jump off, and name anything they want to become.
the brunette ran, jumped off, and said butterfly, the redhead ran jumped and said eagle, the blonde ran tripped over the edge and said "ah shit!"
