Joke #5726

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to count the stairs on a escalator.
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has 81.16 % from 172 votes. More jokes about: blonde

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Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?  A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde woman is driving down the road. She notices that she’s low on gas, so she stops at a gas station. While she’s pumping her gas, she notices that she locked the keys in the car. So when she goes inside to pay, she asks the attendant for a hanger so that she can attempt to open the door herself. She returns outside and begins to jimmy the lock. Ten minutes later, the attendant comes out to see how the blonde is faring. Outside the car, the blonde is moving the hanger around and around while the blonde inside the car is saying, “A little more to the left…a little more to the right!…”
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has 82.97 % from 271 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car
A blond was taking a shower and her husband called in and asked "did you find the new dry hair shampoo I picked up for you?" And the blond replied "yes but there's a problem I already got my hair wet"
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has 34.09 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: blonde, husband
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette all enter the International Breast Stroke Swim across the English Channel. After about 8 hours, the brunette makes it across, followed shortly by the redhead. No sign of the blonde. After 12 hours they decide they'd better go look for her when she pretty much washes up on shore. They rush over to her and wrap her in warm blankets and give her a hot drink. After a few minutes, she is breathing easier and says, "I don't like to tattle, but I think those other ladies were using their arms!"
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has 78.55 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: blonde, sport, stupid, time, women
A blonde keeps checking her mail box. A neighbour notices her repeated trips to the kerb and asks if she’s waiting for a special delivery. ‘No,’ she replies. ‘But my computer keeps telling me I have mail.’
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: blonde
As the crowded elevator descended, Mrs. Simpson became too furious with her husband, who was delighted to be pressed against a gorgeous blonde. As the elevator stopped at the main floor, the blonde suddenly whirled, slapped Mr. Simpson, and said, "That will teach you to pinch!" Bewildered, Mr. Simpson was halfway to the parking lot with his wife when he choked, "I...I...didn't pinch that girl." "Of course you didn't" said his wife, consolingly. "I did."
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has 84.13 % from 569 votes. More jokes about: blonde, husband, marriage
Q. Why is it okay for dumb blonde's to catch cold? A. They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.
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has 42.61 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: blonde, health
A blonde was at home watching TV with her friends when she heard a noise. She ran out just in time to see a thief drive off in her car. "Did you see their face?" her friends asked when she came back inside. "No, but it's okay, I got the license plate number!"
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has 76.54 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: Did you hear the one about the blonde that had a problem with her bed? A: She couldn't find a knife large enough to apply the bed spread.
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has 61.01 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: blonde, stupid
How do you make a blonde’s eyes sparkle? Shine a torch into her ear.
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has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: blonde