How do you confuse a blonde?
Tell her to count the stairs on a escalator. 
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A car was driving down the street when all of a sudden it started swerving.
The car was going back and forth till someone with a cell phone called the police.
A police officer pulled the car over.
A blonde rolls down the window and says, "Officer, I'm so glad you are here. I saw a tree in the road, then I saw another. So I had to swerve to keep from hitting it!"
The officer looks at her, then says, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."
What’s five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A blonde parade.
Why don't blondes like to breastfeed their babies?
It hurts to boil their nipples!
Q: Why should you keep a blonde on the job 7 days a week?
A: So you don't have to retrain them every Monday.
A blonde goes into a music store and asks the guy who works there where the country music CD's are.
The salesman replies, "Try the other side."
So the blonde moves to his other ear and says, "Where are the country music CD's?"
Why does a blonde have an IQ 1 point higher than a policehorse?
So she won't shit on the street during a parade.
Q: Why don't they let Blondes swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert.
They found a lamp and rubbed it.
A genie popped out and granted them each one wish.
The redhead wished to be back home.
Poof! She was back home.
The brunette wished to be at home with her family.
Poof! She was back home with her family.
The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
A blonde finds a lamp with a genie inside.
He says, "I will grant you three wishes."
The blonde says, "For my first wish, I want my love handles to disappear."
The genie replies, "Your wish is my command."
Suddenly, the blonde exclaims, "Holy sh*t! What did you do with my ears?"