Joke #11374

Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat? A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
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A Democrat walks into a doctor's office with a frog sitting on his head. The frog looks at the doctor and says, "Hey doc, can you get this wart off my ass?
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A doctor, an architect, and an attorney were dining at the country club one day, and the conversation turned to the subject of their respective dogs, which were apparently quite extraordinary. A wager was placed on who had the most intelligent dog. The physician offered to show his dog first, and called to the parking lot, “Hippocrates, come!” Hippocrates ran in, and was told by the doctor to do his stuff. Hippocrates ran to the golf course and dug for a while, producing a number of bones. He dragged the bones into the country club, and assembled them into a complete, fully articulated human skeleton. The physician patted Hippocrates on the head, and gave him a cookie for his efforts. The architect was only marginally impressed, and called for his dog, “Sliderule, come!” Sliderule ran in, and was told to do his stuff. The dog immediately chewed the skeleton to rubble, but reassembled the fragments into a scale model of the Taj Mahal. The architect patted his dog and gave him a cookie. The attorney watched the other two dogs, and called “Bullshit, come!” Bullshit entered and was told to do his stuff. Bullshit immediately sodomised the other two dogs, stole their cookies, auctioned the Taj Mahal replica to the other club members for his fee, and went outside to play golf.
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Q: What do Democrats and porn stars have in common? A: They are experts in switching positions in front of a camera.
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Why do rabbits go to the beauty parlor? For hare care.
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What do you get if you cross a cow with a spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster? A cockerpoodlemoo.
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Q: How do you know that Democrats are a diverse people? A: Because they keep count of how many people they know in each racial or ethnic category.
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Q: What is a Democratic Free Market? A: One that hands out slices of cheese.
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Q: When do Democrats like the idea of a flat tax? A: After it reaches 95%
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Why couldn't the skunk use her phone? It was out of odor!
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Q: Why should Democrats be buried 100 feet deep? A: Because deep down, they're really good people.
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