Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat?
A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
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A Democrat walks into a doctor's office with a frog sitting on his head.
The frog looks at the doctor and says, "Hey doc, can you get this wart off my ass?
Q: What's the difference between Elvis and a smart Liberal?
A: Elvis has been sighted.
Q: What is foreplay for a Liberal?
A: Thirty minutes of begging.
Roses are red.
Your blood is too.
You look like a monkey
And belong in a zoo.
Do not worry,
I'll be there too.
Not in the cage,
But laughing at you.
Q: How do you know that Democrats are a diverse people?
A: Because they keep count of how many people they know in each racial or ethnic category.
What do you get if you cross a longhorn with a knight?
Sir Loin.
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple?
A: The Holocaust.
Vote:
Q: What do Democrats and porn stars have in common?
A: They are experts in switching positions in front of a camera.
Q: Why should Democrats be buried 100 feet deep?
A: Because deep down, they're really good people.
I went to the movie theater the other day and in the front row was an old man and with him was his dachshund.
It was a sad, funny kind of film.
In the sad part, the dachshund cried his eyes out, and in the funny part, the dachshund laughed its head off. This happened all the way through the film.
After the film had ended, I decided to go and speak to the man.
"That's the most amazing thing I've seen," I said.
"That dachshund really seemed to enjoy the film."
The man turned to me and said, "Yeah, it is. He hated the book."