Q: What kind of music do elves like best?
A: "Wrap" music!
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A: Who sings "Blue Christmas" and makes toy guitars?
A: Elfis!
Rappers are like the pens at the bank.
They all have chains on them, and don't write very well.
The Beatles originally sang "All you need is Chuck Norris".
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Q: What kind of bread do elves make sandwiches with?
A: Why, shortbread of course!
There was this old woman who heard a song called “Two Lips and Seven Kisses.”
She called up information after hearing the song on the radio to get the name of the record company.
In dialing, she erroneously called up a gas station, and she asks, “Do you have “Two Lips and Seven Kisses?”
The gas station attendant who answered the phone said, “No, but I have two nuts and seven inches!”
So the woman asked, “Is this a record?”
To which the man replied, “No, its average!”
Baby, baby, baby ooh!
Mom: *walks in* Are you listening to Justin Bieber?
Daughter: No, I'm watching porn.
Mom: Oh, thank goodness.
Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get?
A: Mistle-toes!
A little monster was learning to play the violin,' I'm good, aren't I?' he asked his big brother.
'You should be on the radio,' said his brother.
'You think I'm that good?'
'No, I think you're terrible, but if you were on the radio, I could switch you off !
What's a rabbits favorite song?
"Hoppy Birthday to You."