Joke #11538

I farted in a room of hipsters and I watched them fight each other over who heard it first.

Q: How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet? A: You can't touch that toilet, it's art.

If there are two people in an elevator and one of them farts everybody knows who did it.

A haggard old lady rides in a fancy hotel's elevator. On the second floor, a beautiful woman steps on and arrogantly says to the old lady, "Georgio, $100 an ounce." On the next floor, an equally beautiful women steps on and says, "Chanel, $150 an ounce." The old lady's floor approaches and as the doors open, she bends over, farts and says, "Broccoli, 49 cents a pound."

Yo momma so poor I farted in her house and she bowed her head, stomped her feet and praised the lord saying " we got heat".

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram

What's the definition of bravery? A man with diarrhea chancing a fart!

Q: What did the maxi pad say to the fart? A: You are the wind beneath my wings.

Q: Why did the hipster burn his tongue? A: Because he ate his food before it was cool.

Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings." The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose." The third boy said, "Well, my dad can blow smoke rings out of his butt." The first and second boys where amazed. The second boy said, "Have you seen him do it?" "No," said the third boy, "but I've seen the tobacco stains on his underwear."

My late grandfather always told me: "When there is a wind in your belly blow it out gently you feel a real comfort then look at the other's faces to see what are their reactions."