I farted in a room of hipsters and I watched them fight each other over who heard it first.
One morning when I was going out of the house I met my neighbor's daughter who was pregnant. When I returned home I saw her father closing the door. I told him: "Your daughter hasn't married yet I wonder how it is possible a girl without any husband be pregnant? For a moment her father with a bitter smile said: "She isn't pregnant; it is all wind in her belly. She farts and would recovery." Next year perchance I saw the same girl with a baby in her arms. Next day when I was going out facing her father so I told him: "I saw your daughter with her fart in her arms."
Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram
You are so old, you fart dust.
Q: How do you drown a hipster? A: In the mainstream.
If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.
Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
Kind of surprised hipsters haven't started tying their beard's in man buns yet.
Q: Why there are many bubbles on the pool's water? A: Swimmers are farting.
There was an old married couple who love each other very much. But each morning as he was waking up the husband let out a huge nasty wet fart with his wife right in the bed next to him. The wife always says "One day you're going to fart your guts out if you don't stop." Then one day the wife snapped she won't take it anymore and she got up extra early when downstairs and got the guts out of a turkey and put it in the bed behind. She went back downstairs to wait and then she heard the loud disgusting fart all the way down the stairs and then she hears nothing for a long while. Just as she's about to go upstairs and check on her husband he comes stomping down the steps and he says "Honey you were right after I get my guts out but with the grace of God and these two fingers I managed to shove them back up there again."