This guy said send me a naked pic, so I sent him a picture of my kitty.
She's not wearing any clothes.
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Q: What does a kitty like to eat for breakfast?
A: Mice Krispies.
Two kittens on a sloped roof.
Wchich one slides off first?
The one with the lowest mew.
On Sunday little Johnny with his dad went for bathing.
The ground was slippery.
So poor boy for avoiding of knocking down grabbed his father's penis.
His father smiled and told him: "Oh boy you are lucky. If you were with your mother you were concussion!"
Q: What do you get if you cross a fence post was a kitty?
A: A poleca.
If you throw a kitten out of a moving car, would it be considered kitty litter?
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What do you call a blonde with pig tails?
A blowjob with handlebars.
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray this cushy life to keep.
I pray for toys that look like mice,
And sofa cushions, soft and nice.
I pray for gourmet kitty snacks,
And someone nice to scratch my back,
For windowsills all warm and bright,
For shadows to explore at night.
I pray I'll always stay real cool
And keep the secret feline rule
To never tell a human that
The world is really ruled by cats!
Why pay $5 at Subway when you can get this footlong for free?
Q: What do you get when you take a Kitty Kat to the tailor?
A: Bad Blood.
Peter approaches the gates of Heaven.
"Knock knock," says Peter.
Miraculously, someone answers him.
"Who's there," a voice in the distance asked.
"God," says Peter.
"God who," asked the voice?
"GOD DAMMIT open these gates!
I've been a good neighbor, loved my wife and lost my virginity, twice!"
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