Joke #11765

Q: What did the big furry hat say to the warm woolly scarf? A: "You hang around while I go on ahead."
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: winter

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen". The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them". Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".
Vote: has 84.90 % from 620 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: computer, IT, technology, wife, winter
One winter year, these two little fleas headed for the warm sunny beaches of California to escape the cold. The first flea got there and started rubbing suntan lotion on his little flea arms and his little flee legs. Just then, the second flea arrived just a shiverin' and a shakin'. The first flea asked, "What the hell happened to you?" To which the second flea replied "I just rode out here on a bikers mustache and I'm so very coldddd!" The first flea said, "Don't you know the special trick to gettin here, first you go to the airport, go straight to the mens cammode, wait for a young pilot to come along, and when he sits down you climb right up between his butt cheeks where its nice and warm". The second flea agreed that this was a grand idea. The next winter comes along and it was time for the fleas to head for the sunny beaches again. The first flea arrived and began putting suntan lotion on his little flea arms and his little flea legs. About that time, the second flea arrived again just a shiverin', shakin', and mumbling about how cold he was. The first flea exclaimed "Didn't you learn anything that I taught you about getting here nice and warm?" To which the second flea replied, "I did just as you said; I went to the mens cammode and this pilot came in and sat down, I climbed right up between his butt cheeks and it was so very warm. Next thing I know we stop at a bar and I fell asleep. All of a sudden I woke and there I was, right back on that bikers mustache!
Vote: has 73.03 % from 230 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: airplane, bar, gay, travel, winter
Q: What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? A: Snowballs.
Vote: has 74.94 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, men, winter, women
Q: How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed? A: You wake up wet!
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, winter
Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter? A: Because their lips will get chapped!
Vote: has 39.94 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, dirty, winter, women
Q: What did the snowman order at McDonalds ? A: Icerbergers with chilly sauce!
Vote: has 73.52 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, winter
Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: hipster, love, winter
Q: What does Frosty's wife put on her face at night? A: Cold cream!
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, wife, winter
The below are valid reasons as to why drinking should be allowed at work. If you use them wisely, you may even be able to convince your boss to allow alcohol. 1. It's an incentive to show up. 2. It reduces stress. 3. It leads to more honest communications. 4. It reduces complaints about low pay. 5. It cuts down on time off because you can work with a hangover. 6. Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear. 7. It helps save on heating costs in the winter. 8. It encourages carpooling. 9. Increases job satisfaction because if you have a bad job you don't care. 10. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work. 11. It makes fellow employees look better. 12. It makes the cafeteria food taste better. 13. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they are wasted. 14. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
Vote: has 65.24 % from 64 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, holiday, money, winter, work
Q: What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby's crib? A: A snowmobile!
Vote: has 73.52 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, wife, winter