Joke #11765

Q: What did the big furry hat say to the warm woolly scarf? A: "You hang around while I go on ahead."
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Q: How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed? A: You wake up wet!
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A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen". The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them". Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".
Vote: has 84.72 % from 648 votes. Send joke:

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Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true.
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Q: What did Jack Frost say to Frosty the Snowman? A: Have an ice day!
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Q: Why do more niggers get hit by cars in the winter? A: They're easier to spot.
Vote: has 69.11 % from 157 votes. Send joke:

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In the winter of 1926, Thelma Goldstein from Chicago treated herself to her first real vacation in Florida. Being unfamiliar with the area, she wandered into a restricted hotel in North Miami. "Excuse me," she said to the manager. "My name is Mrs. Goldstein, and I’d like a small room for two weeks." "I’m awfully sorry," he replied, "but all of our rooms are occupied." Just as he said that, a man came down and checked out. "What luck," said Mrs. Goldstein. "Now there’s a room. "Not so fast, Madam. I’m sorry, but this hotel is restricted. No Jews allowed." "Jewish? Who’s Jewish? I happen to be Catholic." "I find that hard to believe. Let me ask you, who was the Son of God?" "Jesus, Son of Mary." "Where was he born?" "In a stable." "And why was he born in a stable?" "Because a schmuck like you wouldn’t let a Jew rent a room in his hotel!"
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Q: What did the Arctic wolf ask in the restaurant? A: "Are these lemmings fresh off the tundra?"
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Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
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On a cold day of January, I went to visit one of my friends in his house; it was snowing and my friend urged me to stay the night with him. They had only 2 rooms one for themselves and other for their baby; so I suggested to rest in baby' room. In middle of the night, I need WC which was in the garden and was so difficult for me to go there. I thought some moments then decided to change my place with the baby. I did so. And pissed in the place of baby; when I returned to change again I saw that the baby had shitted in my bed!
Vote: has 86.93 % from 179 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Where does a snowman keep his money? A: In a snow bank.
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