Joke #13088

Q: What do pirates wear in the winter? A: Long Johns!
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
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A foursome is waiting at the men's tee when another foursome of ladies are hitting from the ladies tee. The ladies are taking their time and when finally the last one is ready to hit the ball she hacks it about 10 feet, goes over to it, hacks it another ten feet and looks up at the men waiting and says apologetically "I guess all those fucking lessons I took this winter didn't help." One of the men immediately replies, "No, you see that's your problem. You should have been taking golf lessons instead."
Vote: has 63.51 % from 38 votes. Send joke:
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Q: Why are black people, pirates? A: Because they go nigarrr.
Vote: has 37.97 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
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A pirate walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks down and says, "You know that you have a steering wheel in your pants" The pirate replies, "Ay, it's drivin' me nuts."
Vote: has 25.81 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
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Q: What's a good holiday tip? A: Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:
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Q: What's a horny pirate's worst nightmare? A: A sunken chest with no booty!
Vote: has 75.27 % from 27 votes. Send joke:
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A trucker stops at a red light and a blonde catches up to him. She knocks on the window and says, "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load." The trucker just ignores her, the light changes, and he proceeds down the street. At the next light, the blonde again catches up and says, "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load." He ignores her again and continues down the street. At the next red light the blonde catches up, all out of breath, knocks on the window and says, "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load." The trucker looks at her and finally, he says, "Hi, my name is Kevin, it's snowing, and I'm driving a salt truck."
Vote: has 74.36 % from 56 votes. Send joke:
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Q: If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? A: H2O cubed.
Vote: has 74.15 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
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A pirate walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender walks over to him and says "Hey, I couldn't help but notice when you walked in. Is that a steering wheel hung between your legs?" "Aye!" replied the pirate, "And it's drivin' me nuts!"
Vote: has 26.16 % from 13 votes. Send joke:
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Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true.
Vote: has 39.94 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
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A pirate was on his ship and his watchman comes to him and says, "1 enemy ship on the horizont." The captain says, "Bring me my red shirt, no men get injured or die." So the watchman comes to him and asks, "Why did you want your red shirt?" The captain says, "Because if i get injured they won't see and keep on fighting." So the watchman comes to him again and says, "20 enemy ships on the horizont." The captain says, "Bring me my brown pants."
Vote: has 75.17 % from 53 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, men, pirate, war