Q: Why do hipsters love ice?
A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
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Q: What did the Arctic wolf ask in the restaurant?
A: "Are these lemmings fresh off the tundra?"
Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: You wouldn't know, it's kind of an obscure number.
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An old couple gets pulled over and...
Lady cop:"May I see you license and registration sir?"
Old man:"Ugh, what did she say?"
Old wife:"She needs to see you license and registration dear."
The old man hands it to the lady cop and...
Lady cop:"Oh, I see you are from New York. I used to have a lover from New York, he was the worst lover I ever had."
Old man:"Ugh, what did she say?"
Old wife:"Nothing dear, she thinks she used to know you."
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Q: What did Jack Frost say to Frosty the Snowman?
A: Have an ice day!
Me: "I love you."
You: "Is that you or the wine talking?"
Me: "It's me talking to the wine."
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Q: What are three words you dead the most while making love?
A: "Honey, I'm home."
Q: How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
A: You can't touch that toilet, it's art.
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Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater?
A: They went to see "Closed for the Winter".
Q: Why do more niggers get hit by cars in the winter?
A: They're easier to spot.
Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Dude, the light bulb was cooler before it changed.
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