I'm so hipster, even I've never heard of my favorite band.
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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.
Q: What do you get if you cross a fridge and a hipster playlist?
A: Cool music!
Q: How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
A: You can't touch that toilet, it's art.
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What does Michael Jackson call a Tickle-Me-Elmo doll?
Bait!
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Q: Why did the hipster leave his oceanside mansion?
A: It was too current.
Chuck Norris once stood on a bridge in London.
Then they wrote a song about it.
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Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men?
A. He thought it was a home delivery service.
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Q: Why did the hipster float down the tributary?
A: Because the river was too mainstream.
Three desperately ill men go to their docter seeking help.
One is and alcoholic, One is a chain smoker and the other is gay.
The doctor tells the men if you indulge in any of your habits again you will die.
So the three men leave and then the alcoholic sees a bar and hears its loud music and can't resist.
He orders a shot of whisky drinks it and suddenly drops down dead the other two men walk out side realising how serious this is, but then the chain smoker sees a half a ciggarette on the ground still burning so the gay guy says to the chain smoker "if you bend over to pick that up were both dead"
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
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