Q: What do you get when you combine a Starbucks and Yoga class?
A: I don't know, but there's probably a hipster close by.
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Why are football stadiums always cool?
"Because they're full of fans."
I farted in a room of hipsters and I watched them fight each other over who heard it first.
Why couldn't Usain Bolt listen to his music?
"Because he broke the record."
Hipsters wear jackets in the summer, before it's cool.
"I felt a lump in my mouth as the ball went in." - Terry Venables.
Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Dude, the light bulb was cooler before it changed.
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Q: How do you drown a hipster?
A: In the mainstream.
Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year.
In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.
Q: Why do hipsters love ice?
A: Because ice was water before it was cool.