Q: What do you get when you combine a Starbucks and Yoga class?
A: I don't know, but there's probably a hipster close by.
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Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One to screw it in and the other to wear skinny jeans.
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Q: Why are farmers cooler than Hipsters?
A: Farmers can go a day without their Pitchfork
Q: Why did Hitler hate golf?
A: Because he ended up in the bunker.
You: "I'm only 35, I have my whole life ahead of me."
Sports Broadcaster: "Here comes the oldest player in the league. He's 32. A miracle."
I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley.. She said "Tenpin?"
I said, "No, permanent."
Q: Why do hipsters love ice?
A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
Q: What's a hipster's favorite profession?
A: Mortician. All of his work is 6 feet underground.
Q: You know what would make America great again?
A: If we kept the Mexicans and deported the hipsters.
I'm so hipster, even I've never heard of my favorite band.
