Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
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Chuck Norris uses a gun to be humane.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid, he wanted to see if you really could kill two birds with a stone.
Let's just say that's why birds fly still south in the winter.
Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
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Chuck Norris can Do Mental Math on Paper.
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The reason newborn babies cry is because they know they have just entered a world with Chuck Norris.
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Chucks Norris's mirror is scared to look at him.
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Chuck Norris knows what pi tastes like.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have an ATM PIN – the machine just spits out cash – at every bank!
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use a coffee maker, he puts the coffee beans in his mouth and boils them with his rage.
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