Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
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Chuck Norris solved Unsolved Mysteries.
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Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
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In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep.
Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus and the jeep.
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When someone is in trouble it's a job for Superman, when Superman is in trouble it's a job for Chuck Norris.
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During the Vietnam War, Chuck Norris allowed himself to be captured.
For torture, they made him eat his own entrails.
He asked for seconds.
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Chuck Norris dosent swim, water just likes him.
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Chuck Norris can experience a once in a life time occurrence... twice.
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When Chuck Norris surfs the Internet, he actually surfs on a virtual wave of 1's and 0's.
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Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.
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Chuck Norris one checked the Library of Congress for typos during his lunch hour.
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