Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
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Chuch Norris filmed the making of the first camera.
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Chuck Norris tried to shave with Darth Vaders's light saber, but the light went out as soon as it realized Chuck Norris was there.
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Chuck Norris has a vacation home on the sun.
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Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
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The fact that the evil killer doll from the movie 'Child's play' is named 'Chucky' is not a coincidence.
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Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
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Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey.
The country there now is only an impostor.
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Chuck Norris can punch your thoughts and give you a headache.
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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Chuck Norris can fire Vince McMahon.
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