Chuck Norris dosent swim, water just likes him.
Chuck Norris went up the creek without a paddle... or a canoe.
Prisons don’t keep society safe from criminals. Prisons keep criminals safe from Chuck Norris, for now.
Chuck Norris once wrestled an Alligator. He walked away with a new set of luggage.
The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Chuck Norris doesn't run out of patience, patience runs out of him from fear of a roundhouse kick to the face.
Chuck Norris is allowed to draw pictures of Mohammad.
Chuck Norris cancelled his own funeral.
Chuck Norris once cried just to see what it was like. The end result was the creation of life.
Chuck Norris has his own protien powder. The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.