Joke #12091

Q: Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store? A: Somebody told him he was ripped!
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, fitness, IT

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I quit my gym this morning because one of the instructors started shouting at me, "Come on man, you've got to want it! Come on push. You can do it." I hate being disturbed when I'm having a dump.
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"Have you got the address of the butter website?" "Yes, but don't spread it around."
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I provide technical support for the computer software published by my company. One day, over the phone, I was helping a customer install a product on a Macintosh. The procedure required him to delete an old file. On the Mac, there is an icon of a trash can that is used to collect items to be permanently deleted. I told the customer to click on the old file and drag it to the trash. Then I had him perform a few other steps. As a reminder, I said, "Don't forget to empty the trash." Obediently he replied, "Yes, dear."
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Q: What has a key but no lock and has space but no room? A: A computer?
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I think Chuck Norris is fake cuz if he were real he'd come right now and smash my face into my keyboaraoebdbfjvjdblgoirugsvdkf
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Q: What deodorant do SEO consultants wear? A: Lynx
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There were two guys at a gym Dan and Mike who hit the showers after a hard morning workout. Dan said to Mike "Hey! Have you heard? That there is a gay guy at our gym today." The Mike looking really curious and replies "Oh? Who do you think he is?" Dan looks at Mike from mid-section to eye level and, says "Let me give you a kiss first before I tell you who."
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has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: communication, fitness, gay, gym, love
What do Scientists have for snacks? Micro-chips.
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A colleague was planning a trip to my business office and asked if I could find him a hotel with exercise facilities. I called several hotels, with no luck. Finally, I thought I had found one. I asked the receptionist if the hotel had a weight room. "No," she replied, "but we have a lobby and you can wait there."
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A really bad impressionist walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the wrong face?"
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: bar, beauty, communication