Joke #1220

What do you have when you have two little balls in your hand? A man's undivided attention.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Alex an Aussie builder was going through a house he had just built for the woman who owned it. She was telling him what colour to paint each room. They went into the first room and she said "I want this room to be painted a light blue." The builder went to the front door and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"  When he went back into the house, she told him that the next room was to be bright red. The builder went to the front door and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"  When he went back into the house, she told him that the next room was to be tan. The builder went to the front door and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"  When he came back, the lady was pretty curious, so she asked him "I keep telling you colours, but you go out the front and yell 'green side up' - what is that for?" The builder said, "Oh don't worry about that, I've just got a couple of Kiwi's laying the turf out front."
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, women, work
A man goes to the doctor with a piece of lettuce dangling from his rectum. "That looks nasty," says the doctor. "Nasty?" the man says. "That's just the tip of the iceberg."
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, men
Men are divided into two groups: 50% are wise and 50% have married.
Vote: has 85.10 % from 47 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, marriage, men
Bigamy is having one husband too many. Some say monogamy is the same.
Vote: has 34.87 % from 8 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
My Dearest Susan, Sweetie of my heart. I’ve been so desolate ever since I broke off our engagement. Simply devastated. Won’t you please consider coming back to me? You hold a place in my heart no other woman can fill. I can never marry another woman quite like you. I need you so much. Won’t you forgive me and let us make a new beginning? I love you so. Yours always and truly, John P.S. Congratulations on you winning the state lottery.
Vote: has 39.32 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, men, women
Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage? Because they are tired of using their own.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, men, women
How can you tell soap operas are fictional? In real life, men aren't affectionate out of bed.
Vote: has 20.85 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
A huge guy walks into a bar, approaches a little guy and karate chops him in the back. When the little guy gets up, the huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from Korea." A little later, the huge guy walks back over to the little guy and karate chops him in the back. The huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from China." The little guy leaves the bar, comes back and hits the huge guy on the back. The huge guy lies unconscious on the floor. The little guy tells the bartender, "Tell him that was a crowbar from Sears."
Vote: has 75.27 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bar, men
"I can't wait for Father's Day" said no man ever.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Fathers day, men
How many men would it take to mop a floor? No one knows; they've never done it.
Vote: has 72.24 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men