Joke #7930

How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? A. One - men will screw anything. B. One - men will screw up anything. C. Five - one to actually do the screwing, four to listen to him brag about it.
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Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
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How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One...men will screw anything.
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Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. Men will screw anything.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

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Q:How many divorced men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A:None, the sockets go with the house.
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How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? ONE......He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
Vote: has 29.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

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Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Dogs are man's best friend. So which is the dumber sex?
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Why can't single women fart? They don't get an asshole till they get married.
Vote: has 70.84 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

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A priest and a shepherd from Australia participate in a TV game. After answering all the questions, there is a tie. So both are given one final assignment. It is to write a poem in three minutes, using the word "Timbuktu". It is city in Africa. The priest returns with the fruit of his inspiration: "I was a father all my life, I had no children, had no wife, I read the bible through and through on my way to Timbuktu ... " The poem makes a great impression, and the priest smells a sweet victory. But then comes the shepherd, with his winning masterpiece: "When Tim and I to Brisbane went We met three women cheap to rent. They were three and we were two, So I booked one and Tim Booked Two ... "
Vote: has 84.23 % from 140 votes. Send joke:

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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.
Vote: has 72.41 % from 436 votes. Send joke:

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John asks his wife, Mary, what she wants to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. “Would you like a new Mink Coat?” he asks. “Not really,” says Mary. “Well how about a new Mercedes sports car?” says John. “No,” she responds. “What about a new vacation home in the country?” he suggests. She again rejects his offer with a, “No thanks.” Frustrated he finally asks, “Well what would you like for your anniversary?” “John, I’d like a divorce,” answers Mary. John thinks for a moment and replies “Sorry dear, I wasn’t planning to spend that much.”
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