When you were in the gang then, you just had to look cool, just walk around and look like you were tough.
Someone started talking about fighting -- 'No, man, I've got to go home.'
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Good News: A busload of lawyers ran off a cliff.
The bus was destroyed and there were no survivors.
Bad News: There were three empty seats.
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While we were working at a men's clothing store, a customer asked my coworker to help her pick out a tie that would make her husband's blue eyes stand out.
"Ma'am," he explained, "any tie will make blue eyes stand out if you tie it tight enough."
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Joke has 76.68 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: beauty, black humor, customer service, death, work
Which is the only day you you are safe in a cannibal village?
Sitter days (when they eat the baby-sitter instead)!
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These two guys are riding in a convertible down a road in the desert, the road runs alongside a railroad as they are driving, as they are driving a train goes past, on the train a guy is on the train, clutching his stomach and grunting, his buddy leans over, and asks him,
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
The guy replies, "I gotta shit real bad, and I can't reach the bathroom in time!"
His buddy tells him "Hang your ass out the window, and let it fly."
The guy hangs his ass out the window and the shi t flies back and hits the convertible.
The guys in the convertible say "Damn, that guy on the train spit tobacco on us!"
The guy asks his friend "Hey, pull over when the train stops and we'll find this guy and kick his ass".
After he finishes talking the guy driving the car slows down.
His friend says "Why are you slowing down, don't you wanna beat this guy up."
His friend says "No!"
The other guy says "Why".
His friend says, "Number one, that is some of the stinkiest tobacco I've ever smelled, and number two, did you see the jaws on that son of a bitch!"
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What's yellow and black and makes you laugh ?
A bus full of niggers going over a cliff.
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Always go to other people’s funerals, or they won’t go to yours.
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Q: What's the nickname for someone who put their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex?
A: Lefty.
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Don't make 9/11 jokes, my dad died at the twin towers.
The best damn pilot in Saudi Arabia.
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Q: How do you make a dead baby float?
A: One scoop of ice cream and Two scoops of dead baby.
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Q: How do you get a Jew to win a race?
A: Drop a quarter at the finish line.
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