Q: What explorer was the best at Hiding and Seek?
A: Marco Polo.
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Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin.
The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
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Who's the biggest prostitute in history?
Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.
Q: Why couldn't the sailors play cards?
A: The captain was sitting on the deck.
If Charlie Sheen is winning, it's only because Chuck Norris isn't playing.
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Superman and The Flash have a race around the world.
Who wins?
Chuck Norris.
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Police Officer says "We'll never forget 9/11..."
In my mind: "I hope not It's your damn number!"
Q: What game do tornadoes like to play?
A: Twister.
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb.
On his penis.
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Insurance never covers you against damage sustained by Chuck Norris, as it's classed as an Act of God!
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I hear Taylor Swift's ex boyfriends are collabing on a new single called "Maybe You're The Problem".
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