Q: How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving?
A: He was very thinkful.
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A paralegal, an associate, and a partner of a prestigious law firm are walking through a city park and they find an antique oil lamp.
They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke.
The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you one."
"Me first!" says the paralegal. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat with Tom Cruise."
Poof! She's gone.
"Me next!" says the associate. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with a professional hula dancer on one side and a Mai Tai on the other."
Poof! He's gone.
"You're next," the Genie says to the partner.
The partner says: "I want those two back in the office after lunch."
Q: What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey?
A: Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!
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Q: Why dont blacks celebrate Thanksgiving?
A: Because KFC isn't open on holidays.
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When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
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J: What did Miley Cyrus eat for Thanksgiving day?
A: TWERKY!
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Chuck Norris roundhoused some wannabe cop named Agent Sasevel so hard that it rearranged the letters of his name to Steven Seagal.
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I will be unable to delete all the emails you send me until I return from vacation.
Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
For three years, the young attorney had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn.
The last time he'd finally managed an affair with the innkeeper's daughter.
Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short.
There sat his lover with an infant on her lap!
"Helen, why didn't you write when you learned you were pregnant?" he cried.
"I would have rushed up here, we could have gotten married, and the baby would have my name!"
"Well," she said, "when my folks found out about my condition, we sat up all night talkin' and talkin' and decided it would be better to have a bastard in the family than a lawyer."
Bruce Wayne first tried wearing a Chuck Norris mask to inspire fear, until he saw himself in the mirror.
He immediately changed to the Batman
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Q: What does Saddam want for Thanksgiving ?
A: Turkey.
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