Joke #12745

I hope this gas station sells Father's Day cards.

Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.

By tradition, fathers wear a red flower on Father's Day, if their father is alive and a white flower if he's dead. And if they have a nagging wife and a house full of screaming kids, they wear a pink flower - which means they are living but wish they were dead.

"I can't wait for Father's Day" said no man ever.

Happy Father's Day to the only person on the planet still willing to employ me.

Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other, "Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?" "Outstanding," Fred replied. "They taught us all the latest psychological techniques, visualization, association,it made a huge difference for me." "That's great! What was the name of the clinic?" Fred went blank He thought and thought, but couldn't remember. Then a smile broke across his face and he asked, "What do you call that flower with the long stem and thorns?" "You mean a rose?" "Yes, that's it!" He turned to his wife, "Rose, what was the name of that clinic?"

Father's Day always worried James. He was afraid that he will get a gift he can't afford.

"Dad, your Father's Day gift is another year of not having to pay for my wedding."

Happy Father's Day! I got you a present but if you want to get technical then technically you bought it. By the way, can I borrow $20?

My memory has gotten so bad it has actually caused me to lose my job. I'm still employed. I just can't remember where.

Did you know you can download the whole Tyson-Holyfield fight off the internet? It doesn’t take much memory – just two Bytes.