Strong people don't put other people down.
They lift them up and slam them to the ground for maximum impact.
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I do two hours of cardio every day.
But I still need to find the closest parking spot to the gym.
A Serb and an Albanian from Kosovo found a lamp, rubbed it and the Ginnie showed up in front of them.
"I will grant you three wishes for setting me free out of this lamp. But, since there are two of you, one can have two wishes and the other only one".
A Serb said: "I am very modest, I'll have one wish. Let my Albanian friend have two".
"What is your first wish?", the Ginnie asked Albanian.
"I wish that there are no Serbs in Kosovo at all any more".
"Done", said the Ginnie.
" What is your second wish?"
"I wish that whole of Kosovo is surrounded with high wall, so no more Serbs can return ever again".
" Done", said the Ginnie.
"Now you", sad the Ginnie to a Serb, "What is that you wish?".
A Serb was thinking for a moment, than asked the Ginnie: "Are there realy no more Serbs in Kosovo at all?".
"That's right", said the Ginnie.
"And whole of Kosovo is surrounded with high wall?", a Serb asked again.
"It certainly is. All around. Not even a fly could enter it now", the Ginnie replied.
Then Serb said: "OK, now fill it up with water""
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What do you call 100 niggers on the bottom of the sea?
A good start.
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Do you believe in love at first set?
Or should I curl this barbell another 10 times?
Chuck Norris leaves potholes when he jogs.
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Q: Why did Arnold Schwarzenegger train on a desert island?
A: He wanted maximum isolation.
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How did the tugboat get AIDS?
It was rear-ended by a ferry.
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Chuck Norris only works out once a year... that's about all the gym equipment can take.
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This elliptical isn't the only thing getting my heart rate up.
Q: What happened to Jesus when he said "Catch me outside, how bout dat"?
A: He got crucified
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