Joke #10699

Q: Who was the most famous pirate octopus? A: Captain Squid.
Vote:
has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, pirate

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Accountant after reading a nursery rhyme to his child,"No, son. It wouldn't be tax deductible when Little Bo Peep loses her sheep. But I like your thinking."
Vote:
has 74.94 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: accountant, animal, kids, tax
A man was very proud of his guard dog, he would leave it to roam free in the garden to sow the world his house was guarded. One day a woman knocked at his door. “Is that your big dog outside?” Wondering how she had got past him he said: “Yes why?” She said "I’m sorry but my dog just killed him!” “What?” Roared the man “What kind of dog have you got?” “A Peke” Replied the woman. “A Peke? How could that little thing kill my big fine guard dog?” “I think it got stuck in his throat!” replied the woman.
Vote:
has 81.71 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, dog, women
There once was pirate captain who, whenever it looked like a battle would be imminent would change into a red shirt. After observing this behavior for a few months, one of the crew members asked him what it meant. "It's in case I get shot. I don't want you crew members to see blood and freak out." "That's very sensible, sir." At that moment, the crew member spotted eight hostile ships on the horizon. The captain all of a sudden looked very concerned. "Get my brown pants."
Vote:
has 83.24 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: beauty, life, pirate
A game warden was driving down the road when he came upon a boy carrying a wild turkey under his arm. He stopped and asked the boy, "Where did you get that turkey?" The boy replied, "What turkey?" The game warden said, "That turkey you're carrying under your arm." The boy looks down and said, "Well, lookee here, a turkey done roosted under my arm!" The game warden said, "Now look, you know turkey season is closed, so whatever you do to that turkey, I'm going to do to you. If you break his leg, I'm gonna break your leg. If you break his wing, I'll break your arm. Whatever you do to him, I'll do to you. So, what are you gonna do with him?" The little boy said, "I guess I'll just kiss his ass and let him go!"
Vote:
has 81.41 % from 137 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop, game
Q: What's the difference between Chuck Norris and a bear? A: Chuck Norris has more chest hair.
Vote:
has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
I went to the movie theater the other day and in the front row was an old man and with him was his dachshund. It was a sad, funny kind of film. In the sad part, the dachshund cried his eyes out, and in the funny part, the dachshund laughed its head off. This happened all the way through the film. After the film had ended, I decided to go and speak to the man. "That's the most amazing thing I've seen," I said. "That dachshund really seemed to enjoy the film." The man turned to me and said, "Yeah, it is. He hated the book."
Vote:
has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
A blond a, a brunette and a redhead were at the top of a cliff looking down at the beach. Suddenly a genie appears to them and says "I will grant you each one wish if you'll jump off the side of this cliff." So the redhead jumps off and shouts "Seagull" and turns into a seagull and flies away. Then the brunette jumps off and shouts "Whale" and turns into a whale, falls into the sea and swims away. Finally the blond runs towards the cliff edge, but trips at the last second, as as she falls she shouts out "Shit"
Vote:
has 41.85 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, genie, ginger
How did Captain Hook die? He wiped his bum with the wrong hand!
Vote:
has 66.38 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, pirate
Q: How did the pirate get through School? A: By sailing on high C's.
Vote:
has 73.31 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: pirate, school
A pirate walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks down and says, "You know that you have a steering wheel in your pants" The pirate replies, "Ay, it's drivin' me nuts."
Vote:
has 25.81 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, pirate