The stock market really plummeted today, but luckily there is a computer chip that is used to turn off the board if it gets too low.
The Cubs have the same chip in there scoreboard.
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PE Teacher: "Why did you kick that ball straight at the school computer?"
Pupil: "You told me to put it on the Net."
The computer programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball."
Son: "Thank you, daddy, but where is the user's guide?"
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What was Forrest Gump's email password?
1forrest1
After my wife and her former best buddy, another Air Force wife, were separated by a move that posted one husband on the opposite coast, the telephone became their chief means of communication.
When our phone bills showed astronomical increases, the other spouse and I sought relief.
Since we both owned computers, we encourage our wives to use electronic mail.
Now they call on the phone to let each other know that e-mail was sent, then call back to confirm that it arrived and have a conversation about the contents.
Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
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An amateur golfer is one who addresses the ball twice: once before swinging, and once again after swinging.
Why is a woman different from a PC?
A woman won't accept a 3½" floppy.
What’s the hardest thing about learning to ice skate?
The ice.
Who said Windows 98 is a virus was wrong.
Why?
Because a virus does something.
Pull on a coworker is to press ctrl+print screen on their workstation, then paste it into Paint, save the pic, and set it as the desktop background.
Move all of their icons to the trash.
When they get back to their desk, clicking won't accomplish anything!
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