Joke #13420

Knock knock. Who's there? Déja. Déja who? Knock knock.
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has 58.98 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, life, memory

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A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience. He said: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!" The audience was in silence and shock. The speaker added: "And that woman was my mother!" Laughter and applause. A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack this very effective joke at home during a small party. He was a bit foggy after having a drink or two. He said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who was not my wife!" The wife went red with shock and rage. Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, with the guests not saying a word, the manager finally blurted out "... and I can't remember who she was!"
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has 80.86 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: life, management, memory, time, women
Fast way to screw up someone's Knock Knock joke...? "It's open."
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has 69.98 % from 513 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, life
Knock Knock. Who's there? Opportunity. Don't be silly - opportunity doesn't knock twice!
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has 64.05 % from 143 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, life
Knock, knock! Who's there? Opportunity! That is impossible. Opportunity doesn't come knocking twice!
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has 58.87 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, life
One night, there was a knock on my door... i open it and no one was there every night I would get the same knock and still no one was there... Untill the morning I was just making myself some tea as a person knocks on my door it was a black man he walk in and stole my tea .... i said to myself did he just mug me .... I still didn't know who was knocking on the doors at night Untill one night I opened my door and there was a floating mug I was still confused.
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has 43.39 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, life
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? A: Yes. Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory? A: I forget. Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
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has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: doctor, drug, memory
A mathematician, physicist and economist after Titanic crash on uninhabited island in the middle of Atlantic ocean. Starving to death they found a can of roastbeef. They start debating how to open the can without can-opener. Mathematician suggests to drop the can from the cliff to open it. Physicist proposes to heat the can on bonfire. Economist: "Let's suppose the can is opened...."
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: death, life, math
Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other, "Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?" "Outstanding," Fred replied. "They taught us all the latest psychological techniques, visualization, association,it made a huge difference for me." "That's great! What was the name of the clinic?" Fred went blank He thought and thought, but couldn't remember. Then a smile broke across his face and he asked, "What do you call that flower with the long stem and thorns?" "You mean a rose?" "Yes, that's it!" He turned to his wife, "Rose, what was the name of that clinic?"
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: hospital, medical, memory, old people, wife
Womens are like computer virus... they ENTER your life... SEARCH your pocket... SHIFT your balance ... CONTROL your life... when you become an old version DELET you from the system
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has 64.93 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: computer, IT, life, money, women
A diner complained, "Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!" His waiter replied, "That's entirely possible; our cook used to be a tailor."
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: life