Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Opportunity!
That is impossible. Opportunity doesn't come knocking twice!
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Fast way to screw up someone's Knock Knock joke...?
"It's open."
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Knock knock.
Who's there?
Déja.
Déja who?
Knock knock.
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Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Opportunity.
Don't be silly - opportunity doesn't knock twice!
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One night, there was a knock on my door...
i open it and no one was there every night I would get the same knock and still no one was there...
Untill the morning I was just making myself some tea as a person knocks on my door it was a black man he walk in and stole my tea ....
i said to myself did he just mug me ....
I still didn't know who was knocking on the doors at night
Untill one night I opened my door and there was a floating mug I was still confused.
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Knock Knock!
Who's There?
Figs
Figs who?
Figs the doorbell, it's broken!
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A poor minister was having trouble managing his church.
The income was pitiful, the plumbing rattled, the roof leaked, the air conditioning didn't work, and the church didn't have the funds for any repairs.
The minister got a brilliant idea.
He bought a book about hypnosis, and read it from cover to cover.
At the next service, he took out a watch and chain, swung it back and forth, and lulled the congregation into a hypnotic trance.
He said, "I want everybody to walk down the aisle and put $20 in the plate."
They did, and he had the church's roof fixed that week.
This worked so well that the next Sunday he decided to do it again.
Taking his watch out, he proclaimed, "I want everybody to come down the aisle and drop $100 in the offering plate."
They did, and he got the air conditioning fixed and the parking lot redone.
His third Sunday, he got to thinking, "I haven't been paid in a long time. I deserve a little money."
He started swinging his watch again, and he thought, "I deserve a lot more than a little bit of money. I deserve enough to go overseas and have a cottage on the beach. I deserve a lot more."
He got so excited about what he was fixing to receive, that his hands started to sweat and as the watch slipped from his grip, he yelled:
"S**t!"
It took him two weeks to air out the church.
Knock, Knock
Who is there?
A long erected penis with an eye on my head and some wools in my feet.
What do you want?
Is there any body to suck me? I want to weep.
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Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Nobel.
Nobel who?
No bell, I knock.
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Chuck Norris lives in a Roundhouse...
And his favorite drink is punch...
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Knock knock.
Who's there?
The interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh-
Moooooo!
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