What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
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Did you here about the man that died from eating Rocky Mountain Oysters?
The bull must have drug him a mile!
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"Hey Jaeger, are you enjoying that apple?"
"Sure, why do you ask."
"I was going to offer you some toast."
"How kind of... I'll accept."
"Great, but what's toast without any butter Jaeger."
"You're right about that!"
"Well give me a few seconds, let me go scrape some off of your mother's teeth!"
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Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes?
A: The guy who gave it to him.
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Jim and Lena were driving around the countryside when they ran over a skunk.
"We better take the skunk to the vet, Lena.
Just put the skunk between your legs to keep it warm."
"But, Jim, what about the smell?"
"Don't worry, Lena. The skunk will get used to it."
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If you think you have shitty job, what if you were toilet paper!
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Q: What does a plumber need to know about his job?
A: Sh*t runs downhill and payday is on Friday.
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Hey, did you hear about the cannibal who arrived late to the dinner party?
They gave him the cold shoulder!
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What is the difference between a blonde and a toilet?
After you use a toilet it doesn't follow you around for three days.
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A blonde buys a used sports car.
However, during the first joy ride, the engine jerks and the car slows to a stop.
The blonde calls a tow truck.
The mechanic sets to work, and 10 minutes later, the car is running again.
"What was the matter?" she asks.
"Simple really, just sh*t in the carburetor" he replies.
Taken aback she asks, "Oh, how many times a week do I have to put that in?"
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Did you hear about the midget that went into the whorehouse?
He got a twat in the face.
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