Joke #1618

Men are like.....Department Stores. Their clothes should always be half off.
Vote: has 19.47 % from 10 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young girl at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, "I don't think you understand, I want something very special." At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. "Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler said. The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it." The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated by check. "I know you need to make sure the check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank on Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon," he said. Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man. "There's no money in that account." "I know", said the old man, "but can you imagine the weekend I had?"
Vote: has 74.14 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
A boyfriend asks his girlfriend: "What gift would you like to receive during the St. Valentine's Day?" "Well, I don't know" she answers shyly. "OK, that I give you another year to think about it…"
Vote: has 75.38 % from 38 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men, relationship, time, Valentines day
Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg? Because not one will stop and ask for directions.
Vote: has 55.34 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
A man in a pub asks for a beer. The barman says, "Sure, that'll be one dollar." "One dollar?" exclaims the man. Reading the menu, he says, "Could I have steak and chips?" "Certainly," says the barman, "that'll be two dollars." "Two dollars?" cries the man. "You're joking. Where's the guy who owns this place?" The barman says, "Upstairs, with my wife"." The man says, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?" The barman says, "The same thing I'm doing to his business."
Vote: has 80.42 % from 81 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: bar, beer, men, money, wife
Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
Vote: has 81.29 % from 240 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: light bulb, men, work
Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeders, a State Policeman sees a car puttering along at 22 miles per hour. He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver...
Vote: has 48.79 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
Husband: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? Wife: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.
Vote: has 44.24 % from 10 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
John: I didn't sleep with my wife before we were married. Did you? Bob: I'm not sure. What was your wife's maiden name?
Vote: has 85.65 % from 315 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: marriage, men, wife
Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes? A. Both of them.
Vote: has 30.41 % from 9 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
What is the difference between a man and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
Vote: has 32.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, fish, men