Joke #1618

Men are like.....Department Stores. Their clothes should always be half off.
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has 15.98 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men

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A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $20." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.
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has 71.09 % from 149 votes. More jokes about: medical, men, money, sex, women
In the beginning, God created Earth and then rested. After that, He creaed man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God nor man got ever rested.
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: god, men, women
What do you call twelve naked men sitting on each others shoulders? A scrotum pole!
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: men
It's Halloween and when the man answers his door, there's a well-dressed young boy there wearing a suit and matching tie, who says "Trick or treat". The man's a bit confused so he asks the boy what he's dressed up as. "I'm an IRS agent", says the boy, and with that, he snatches 40% of the candy, and leaves without saying thank you.
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: accountant, Halloween, kids, mean, men
Men call us birds, is that because of all the worms we pick up?
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: bird, men
Did you hear about the man who got a vasectomy at Sears? Now every time he gets excited, the garage door goes up.
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has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: men
Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? A. They already have boyfriends.
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: gay, men
A nude guy was sunbathing at the beach, a little girl comes to him, he covers his private parts with a newspaper. The little girl asks, "hats under there?" So the man answers , "A bird..." The girl goes away & the man falls asleep. When he wakes up, he finds himself in a hospital & in alot of pain. A doctor comes up to his bed & asks, 'What happened?' The man answers, "I don't know. I was at the beach & fell asleep after talking to a little girl." So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses. When they got there, they see the little girl the man was talking about. So they ask her if she did anything to the man...? She answers, "I din't do anything to the man, but he was sleeping, I played with his bird, After a while, it spat at me, so i broke its neck, burnt its nest, and smashed all its eggs!"
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has 64.05 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop, doctor, men
There were 11 people – ten men and one woman – hanging onto a rope that came down from a helicopter. They all decided that one person should get off, because if they didn’t, the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go, so finally, the woman gave a really touching speech saying how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children, giving in to men, and not receiving anything in return. When she finished speaking, all the men started clapping.
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has 82.45 % from 301 votes. More jokes about: husband, kids, life, men, women
How does a man show he's planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: beer, men