Joke #1649

Men are like.....Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
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has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: men

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A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $20." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.
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Thanksgiving is the day men start getting in shape... to play Santa Claus.
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It's Halloween and when the man answers his door, there's a well-dressed young boy there wearing a suit and matching tie, who says "Trick or treat". The man's a bit confused so he asks the boy what he's dressed up as. "I'm an IRS agent", says the boy, and with that, he snatches 40% of the candy, and leaves without saying thank you.
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has 69.55 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: accountant, Halloween, kids, mean, men
How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus? At the circus the clowns don't talk.
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has 18.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: men
Statistics say that women think they are smarter than men because they can fake orgasms. Men say "Big deal. We can fake a whole relationship just for a shag."
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men
What does a man make best for dinner? Reservations.
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A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer"
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has 53.47 % from 192 votes. More jokes about: marriage, math, men, wedding, women
4 gay guys walk into a bar and notice there is one stool left. One gay guy suggest to play rock, paper, scissors and the other gay guy says. "Stop all this nonsense. Lets just flip the stool over."
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has 67.84 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: bar, gay, men
What's a man's idea of honesty in a relationship? Telling you his real name.
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What do you call a take-out low-calorie meal for a cowboy? A Saddle Light Dish.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: cowboy, food, men