Joke #191

There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who have regular sex.

Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.

Why was the computer tired when he got home? Because he had a hard drive.

GOD said, “Adam, I want you to do something for me.” “Gladly, Lord,” replied Adam. “What do you want me to do?” “Go down into the valley.” “What’s a valley?” asked Adam. God explained to him, then said, Cross the river.” “What’s a river?” God explained it to him, and then continued, “Go over the hill…”. “What’s a hill?” God explained to Adam what a hill was, then said, “On the other side of the hill, you will find a cave.” “What’s a cave?” After God explained, he said, “In the cave you will find a woman.” Adam asked, “What’s a woman?” So God explained that to him too. He continued, “I want you to reproduce.” “How do I do that?” “Jeez,” God muttered under his breath. He then sighed and explained the birds and the bees to Adam. He liked that concept very much, so he went down into the valley, across the river, over the hill and into the cave where he found a woman.” A little while later, Adam returned and asked God, “What’s a headache?”

What do you call a bent iPhone 6 plus? A dead wringer.

I heard that the missionary position helps men to work out the chest and triceps... do you wanna help me verify this?

The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.

Yo mama is so fat whenever I want to make sex I would request her to fart in order to find the address of her ass.

A girlfriend said to me during sex that I should be a little more graceful, so I went to ballet classes!

What do computers do when they get hungry? They eat chips!

Good girls go to bed at 8 p.m., since they need to be home by 11 p.m.