Joke #2313

How does a frog feel when he has a broken leg? Unhoppy.
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has 37.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal

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There was once a man from the city who was visiting a small farm, and during this visit he saw a farmer feeding pigs in a most extraordinary manner. The farmer would lift a pig up to a nearby apple tree, and the pig would eat the apples off the tree directly. The farmer would move the pig from one apple to another until the pig was satisfied, then he would start again with another pig. The city man watched this activity for some time with great astonishment. Finally, he could not resist saying to the farmer, “This is the most inefficient method of feeding pigs that I can imagine. Just think of the time that would be saved if you simply shook the apples off the tree and let the pigs eat them from the ground!” The farmer looked puzzled and replied, “What’s time to a pig?”
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a bull that runs into a threshing machine? Hamburger.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Accountant after reading a nursery rhyme to his child,"No, son. It wouldn't be tax deductible when Little Bo Peep loses her sheep. But I like your thinking."
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has 74.05 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: accountant, animal, kids, tax
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
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has 58.61 % from 320 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, dirty, masturbation
Cats took many thousands of years to domesticate humans.
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal
Three blondes were walking through a field when they came across a set of tracks. The first blonde looked down at the tracks and said, "I think they could be bird tracks." The second blonde went to look and said, "No, I think these are deer tracks." They stepped aside and the third blonde went over to the tracks. She looked down, then got run over by the train!
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has 61.59 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, death
There are bats hanging of a branch upside down, all except one. Two bats comment: "What's happened to this one? I don't know, two minutes ago he seemed normal and then he fainted.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
A city child came running into the farmhouse. “No wonder that mama pig is so big,” she yelled. “There’s a bunch of little pigs out there blowing her up!”
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has 80.52 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man was driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back seat. The police stop him and say that he can’t drive around with the penguins in the car and should take them to the zoo. The man agrees and drives off. The next day the same man is driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back and again. He is stopped by the same police officer who says, "Hey! I though I told you to take those to the zoo." The man replies "I did. Today I’m taking them to the movies."
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has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop, travel
Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God.
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has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, god