Why did the frog go to the mall?
Because he wanted to go hopping.
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I got a cat the other day.
I had to swerve, but I got it.
How do rabbits get to work?
By rabbit transit.
Q: What is a bee that cant make up his mind?
A: A maybe.
Why did the tadpole feel lonely?
Because he was newt to the area.
Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey.
He chews bees...
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What do you call a flying skunk?
A smellicopter.
A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show.
On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it.
The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner.
After some wheeling and dealing, they settled for $10,000 for the duck and the pot.
Three days later the circus owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your duck is a ripoff!
I put him on the pot before a whole audience, and he didn't dance a single step!"
"What!?" asked the duck's former owner, "did you remember to light the candle under the pot?"
There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods...
Cats have never forgotten this.
Here's proof that Cats are smarter than dogs...
You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.
Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later.
People who hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life.Dogs believe they are human.
Cats believe they are God!
Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel.
I got rid of my husband.
The cat was allergic.My husband said it was him or the cat...
I miss him sometimes.
Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit!
Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it...