Joke #10837

Girl: We have a mayor. Do you? Horse: Sure! Girl: What do you call it? Horse: Same as you do. Mare!
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow? Cowboom!
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man is walking through a park when he steps in a pile of dog mess. He pauses to wipe his shoe on the grass and sees another man step into the same pile. ‘I just did that,’ says the man, so the other man rubs his nose in it.
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has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: animal
What's a moo hoo for a darling bull? A dear steer.
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has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you get if you cross a skunk and a balloon? A creature that stinks to high heaven.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
There was a hysterical call at the fire department, and it went like this: "Help me, please help me! There is a cat meowing and yowling with frequency and urgency. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you please help me, and send the fire squad right away?" "Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax wait until he leaves." "You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!" "Cats aren’t like snakes or spiders that are poisonous, by the way who is calling?" "I’m Josephine’s parrot you jerk!" "Help me please, please help!"
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has 72.87 % from 126 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, death, parrot
Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, lawyer
Q: What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey? A: Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!
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has 65.52 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal, holiday, Thanksgiving
What did one slug say to another who had hit him and rushed off? I ll get you next slime.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
One day a blonde went to a sea food restaurant and saw the tank where they kept the lobsters. She took pity on these creatures and hid them in her purse. Later she went to the woods to set the poor animals free.
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has 62.44 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, food, stupid
A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, "Ribbit. 9- Iron". The man looks around and doesn't see anyone. "Ribbit. 9-Iron." He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong. He puts his other club away, and grabs a 9-iron. Boom! he hits it 10 inches from the cup. He is shocked! He says to the frog, "Wow that's amazing. You must be a lucky frog, eh?" The frog replies "Ribbit. Lucky frog." The man decides to take the frog with him to the next hole. "What do you think frog?" the man asks. "Ribbit. 3-wood." The guy takes out a 3-wood, and boom! A hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn't know what to say. By the end of the day, the man has golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, "OK where to next?" The frog replies, "Ribbit. Las Vegas." They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, "OK frog, now what?" The frog says, "Ribbit. Roulette." Upon approaching the roulette table, the man asks, "What do you think I should bet?" The frog replies, "Ribbit. $3000,black 6." Now, this is a million-to-one shot to win, but after the golf game, the man figures what the heck. Boom - tons of cash come sliding back across the table. The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, "Frog, I don't know how to repay you. You've won me all this money and I am forever grateful." The frog replies, "Ribbit, Kiss Me." He figures, Why not? After all the frog did for him, it is a small price to pay. With the kiss, however, the frog turns into a gorgeous 15-year-old girl. "And that, your honor, is how the girl ended up in my room."
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has 84.92 % from 307 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, golf, women, work