If you crossed a cow with a goat, what would you get?
Half and half.
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Did you hear about the argumentative skunk?
He always liked to make a stink.
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple?
A: The Holocaust.
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Why did the bareback performer ride his horse?
Because it got too heavy to carry.
Are you a shark?
Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.
What is a chameleon's motto?
A change is as good as a rest.
What's a rabbits favourite car?
Any make, just as long it's a hutchback.
An elderly couple was just settled down for bed when the old man realized he left the lights on in the greenhouse in the back yard.
Then they heard voices.
Three men had broken into the greenhouse.
Scared, they called the police.
The dispatcher replied, he would send an officer as soon as one became available as they were all out on calls.
The old man waited for a few minutes and called Dispatch again.
He told Dispatch, "Don't worry about sending an officer, I shot the robbers and now the dogs are eating their bodies!"
In no time at all, police were all over the place and captured the robbers red-handed!
One of the cops asked the old man, "I thought you said you shot the robber and your dogs were eating them.
" The old man replied, "I thought you said, there weren't any officers available."
What do you call a dumb bunny?
A hare brain.
What’s a mouse’s favorite record?
Please cheese me!