Joke #2497

An old man asks a blond: If a guy would try to rape you, will you scream for help? If he can’t manage me by himself off course!
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has 28.61 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: blonde

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A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police officer pulled her over and walked up to the car. The officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for the blonde's driver's license. The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman, "What does a driver's license look like?" Irritated, the blonde cop said, "You dummy, it's got your picture on it!" The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and found a small, rectangular mirror down at the bottom. She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my driver's license" and handed it to the blonde policewoman. The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go. And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have avoided all of this."
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has 46.37 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, cop
Two blondes drive through the middle of Kansas, surrounded entirely by wheat fields. One blonde says, "Look over there!" They see another blonde in scuba gear acting like she's swimming through the wheat. The blonde driving says, "It's girls like that who give us blondes a bad name." The other blonde says, "Yeah! And if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and tell her off."
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has 42.61 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Three blondes were walking through a field when they came across a set of tracks. The first blonde looked down at the tracks and said, "I think they could be bird tracks." The second blonde went to look and said, "No, I think these are deer tracks." They stepped aside and the third blonde went over to the tracks. She looked down, then got run over by the train!
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has 70.18 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, death
Q: What does a blond man do at 03.00 in the night naked at the balcony? A: The blond girl told him to come outside
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has 41.83 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: blonde, sex, time
How do you kill a blonde with one arm? You wave to her.
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has 13.68 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde goes to the doctor with both of her ears and her right hand are burned. "Sit down and tell me how it happened," says the doctor. "I was ironing my clothes when I received a call. Instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and burned my ear." "What about the other ear and your hand?" "I tried to call for an ambulance."
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him, and says, "Hey, wanna hear a blonde joke?" The man says back to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blonde. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler and he is blonde. The bouncer is blonde. The man sitting over to your left is also blonde. Still wanna tell that blonde joke?" The blind man is silent for a moment and then says, "Nah, I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: How do you keep a blonde busy for 7 hours? A: Give her a piece of paper that has the words "Turn Over" on both sides.
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blond a, a brunette and a redhead were at the top of a cliff looking down at the beach. Suddenly a genie appears to them and says "I will grant you each one wish if you'll jump off the side of this cliff." So the redhead jumps off and shouts "Seagull" and turns into a seagull and flies away. Then the brunette jumps off and shouts "Whale" and turns into a whale, falls into the sea and swims away. Finally the blond runs towards the cliff edge, but trips at the last second, as as she falls she shouts out "Shit"
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has 49.86 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, genie, ginger
Q: What did the blonde say when she was offered a position at the UN? A: Would that be a "missionary position?"
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: blonde