Do I have any chance to win?
Asks the boxer.
Off course!
Continue hitting the air and the adversary will shortly get a lung inflammation.
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"Waiter, this vinegar is rather lumpy."
Waiter: "That's because they're pickled onions, sir."
Q: Why can't white people swim?
A: Cause they get soggy.
Vote:
A guy about to tee off was approached by a man who held out a card that read, "I am a deaf mute. May I please play through?"
The first man gave the card back, angrily shaking his head, and saying, "No, you CANNOT play through." He assumed the guy read lips so he mouthed, "I can't believe you would try to use your handicap to your own advantage like that!
Shame on you!"
The deaf man walked away and the first man whacked the ball onto the green and then walked off to finish the hole.
Just as he was about to put the ball into the hole he was hit in the head with a golf ball that knocked him out cold.
When he came to a few minutes later, he looked around and saw the deaf mute sternly looking at him, one hand on his hip, the other hand holding up four fingers.
Why can't girls play hockey?
Because their pads can't last three periods.
Vote:
Q: What is the difference between Cheerios and Georgia Tech?
A: Cheerios belong in a bowl.
Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
Vote:
Guy: "You see doc, the problem is obesity runs in the family."
Doctor: "No, the problem is no one runs in your family."
Yo mama's so skinny, she used a needle for a baseball bat.
There are three men on a desert island: Genius, Smart, and Idiot.
Genius has concluded that at least one man must swim to shore and get help.
Genius volunteered himself, as he is the most likely to get remember to get help.
Genius, not being very athletic, swam halfway to safety and then drowned.
Days later, Smart finally realized Genius drowned.
Smart then decided it was his turn to swim and get help.
Idiot agreed because he didn't know what was happening.
Smart, not being very athletic, swam three quarte rs of the way to safety and drowned.
Days later, Idiot decided it must his turn to swim.
He also did not know what his goal was.
Idiot, not having very much intelligence, swam halfway to safety, felt tired, so he swam back to the island he was stranded on.